The Incredible Hulk 
Ultimate Destruction
review by Head Cheeze

When I was a kid I used to have a pair of Hulk Underoos. Anyone remember those? They were a t-shirt/briefs combo that featured various superheroes on them. The Hulk set I had sported an angry looking Hulk face on the front, and of collage of Hulk action poses on the back. I think the briefs were solid green, which is a good idea when you’re an excitable kid with intolerance to dairy. I used to stomp around the house yelling “Hulk smash!”, somehow convinced that by donning a pair of ratty green underpants and a t-shirt bearing his likeness that I’d somehow absorbed the green guy’s powers. Of course, I was only as powerful as my parent’s tolerance for loud noises were at that particular time of day, and, more often than not, my “rampages” were quelled by either a slap on the rump or a delicious snack (once again, dictated on said parent’s tolerance at that point of the day). I’m older now, and have a place of my own, and while I couldn’t hope to possibly squeeze back into those Underoos, I’ve got a whole new way to rampage now, thanks to Vivendi Universal’s new The Incredible Hulk Ultimate Destruction!

Gamers looking for an involving quest, complicated tactics, or a thought-provoking storyline best look elsewhere, because Ultimate Destruction is about as deep as a shotglass. However, folks who want nothing more than to take out a day’s worth of aggression on a completely destructible environment, where you get to toss everything from cars to cows, will be more than happy with this straightforward in ridiculously entertaining game. The game is billed as an “action-adventure” title, but I think a better description would be “high-tech stress ball”. I spent hours leveling entire neighborhoods, luring cops and choppers to my location, and then jumping into the sky to fetch choppers to smash the cops with. When I got tired of doing that, I started seeing how far I could throw cows, and with what sort of accuracy. It’s a perfect way to end a rough day, and a nice way to kill some time without having to really use much of the ol’ noggin’. Hell, who needs readin’ anyway? Book learnin’s for sissies! Gimme a good ol’ rampage anyday!

The game looks and sounds very good, which is no small achievement given that the majority of what you can see can be destroyed. This means that each and every destructible piece of the environment has to be rendered in such a way that it can show certain levels of damage, from brand spanking new to smoking pile of detritus. That’s quite the resource hog, and, while some vehicles and textures are a bit on the chunky side, overall Ultimate Destruction’s graphics are appropriately cartoonish clean and colourful.

The sound is limited to a lot of smashing, banging, and explosions, with the occasional Hulkism or bit of dialogue thrown in along the way. While I’d have liked some of the sounds to have a bit more impact, neighbours will still be quite concerned if you’ve got this baby cranking through the surround sound system. Sure the people and cows don’t sound the way people and cows would sound if lobbed a quarter of a mile into the side of a concrete building, but sometimes it’s okay to let reality take a backseat to good taste.

In terms of replay value, well that all depends on just how much you like smashing things. Granted, I did find myself getting bored after a few lengthy sessions, but still find myself popping back in for quick rounds of devastation during lunch, or when the wife’s watching The Learning Channel (Learning? Bah! Everything I know I learned on the street, baby! Besides, what does bad interior design have to do with learning, anyway?)!

The Incredible Hulk Ultimate Destruction doesn’t exactly break new ground, but it doesn’t have to. It takes a beloved comic book character and finally gives him a video game that suits his image. Sure, it’s not particularly smart, but neither is The Hulk, which will make this game a smash with his many fans.