The Simpsons-
Hit and Run
review by Head Cheeze

I love The Simpsons. I must watch at least a dozen episodes a week (it's repeats are on five times a day in my neck of the woods), own a vast majority of the action figures, books, comics, and collectibles, and, of course, have every DVD offering Fox has blessed us with. What I haven't had, up until now, has been a reasonably fun and challenging Simpsons video game. Vivendi/Universal has definitely delivered on both points- perhaps, a little too much on the latter- with The Simpsons Hit and Run.

Hit and Run features Grand Theft Auto inspired (read that: blatantly ripped off) gameplay, in which you control each member of the Simpson clan (sans Maggie), as well as Apu (?), as they try to solve a mystery involving UFO's, robotic-camera bearing hornets, black sedans, and more. Each level has you controlling a particular character, and gives you access to that character's signature cars. For example, Homer starts out with the family sedan, but, along the way, you can unlock other vehicles, such as the Mr. Plow and Plow King trucks, by gathering gold coins that are scattered around the city and hidden in soda machines and phone booths. You can then use the phone booths to "call for a ride" from any vehicle you've unlocked. You can also simply run up to a vehicle and climb in, just like in GTA, but there's no car jacking here-you simply hitch a ride as a passenger.

Most of the missions require you to simply race against the clock, either in an attempt to beat someone somewhere, destroy another vehicle, or gather items. These missions range from the mildly easy to infuriatingly difficult, thus making the game something of an ordeal to get through. In one instance, you control Lisa as she is sent off to gather 22 fish scattered throughout the dock area for the Sea Captain. You are given two minutes to do so, which would be fine if it only took, say, a minute and a half to finish without error. However, the mission is impossible to beat lest ye avoid a single crash. This mission is also dependent on the vehicle you choose (something the game never bothers to tell you, even though this is the case in many missions) leaving you to deal with a trial and error approach. If you attempt the mission in a pick-up truck, or Otto's bus, you may as well quit now. I literally attempted this mission over a dozen times before I finally said fuck it and skipped to the next. I found myself doing this quite often, which may explain why I DID finish the game relatively quick, but I certainly didn't beat it.

The game features some very colourful and convincing graphics, as well as an abundance of Simpsons jokes scattered throughout the landscape. While you'll see a lot of familiar landmarks, only a handful offer access, and, even then, it's limited. It would have been a welcome touch were one able to investigate the Simpson family home beyond the living room. However, with the game's rather clumsy controls and poor collision detection, it may be a blessing that the majority of the action take place on the road.

The game's saving grace is it's license, and the involvement of the cast and writers of the show. Hit and Run features an episode's worth of original dialogue and story in the cut-scenes, and loads of familiar catchphrases that the character's blurt out during gameplay. There are also a variety of very funny remarks from pedestrians you run afoul of ("I regret nothing!" and "Getta you face outta my face" are personal favourites). Hit and Run also features almost every major Simpson's character, from Professor Fink to Ralph Wiggum, and, in the bonus games, you can control many of them and their signature vehicles for timed races around Springfield.

While this is certainly the best Simpsons game I've played, it's got it's issues. The controls are sluggish and unresponsive in many cars, making for very frustrating timed missions that will have you yelling at your television like a madman. The mission "variety" doesn't help matters, seeing that the majority of them have you doing the same things over and over against the clock. I'd just complete a particularly maddening round-up of "Flat Meat" for Cletus, and then be assigned an almost identical mission by Wiggum. The developers try and mix things up by throwing in a few non-driving missions, but controlling the characters on foot, with the engine's poor camera movement, is an exercise in futility, often resulting in getting stuck in walls or under platforms simply because you can no longer see your character on screen. Throw in an annoying bug in which people you are supposed to talk to for new missions and hints don't trigger their assigned cut scenes, and you just may find yourself skippin as much of the game as I did.

Still, the game has it's charm, and there are plenty of moments I found myself laughing out loud, in spite of my fury. If Vivendi/Universal could have ironed out a few of the bugs and control issues, and added a bit more variety in terms of missions, The Simpsons Hit and Run could have been one of the highlights of 2003. Instead, it's simply a fun little diversion that is certainly worth a look. However, if you're the type who has to explore every nook and cranny of a game to justify it's purchase, only those with the patience of a saint need apply.