The Skeleton Key
(2005)
review by Bil Withonel

"You have to believe." That's the rule of voodoo. A voodoo curse only works on the subject if the subject believes it will work. Seems like a simple answer, and my life mission of being the eternal skeptic will keep me safe. I simply "don't believe" and no one's mojo will have any effect on me. I also "don't believe" I sat through this whole movie.

Caroline Ellis (Kate Hudson) is hired to watch over and take care of Ben Devereaux (John Hurt). She is sort of a live-in nurse in an old house deep in the swamplands of Louisiana. Ben has had a stroke and is just short of catatonic. While snooping around the house, Caroline finds a hidden room. A conversation with Ben's wife (Gena Rowlands) reveals that the hidden room has not been entered since she and her husband owned the house. It was the room occupied by two creepy caretakers who practiced "Hoo-Doo" (you do?) which is the REAL Voodoo. The caretakers got caught teaching the "Hoo-Doo" to the occupants of the house's children, and were hung and burned for their troubles. The ghosts of the caretakers now haunt the house, via the mirrors, which have all been put away and covered in the attic.

Our hero, Caroline, figures that Ben didn't actually have a stroke, but rather had a "hoo-doo" curse put on him by the dead caretakers. She takes it upon herself to visit a "hoo-doo" store, get a curse-release spell, and perform the ritual. It works, to an extent. It’s soon revealed that something much more sinister than angry "hoo-doo" ghosts are haunting the place. Caroline scores some brickdust which when placed in a doorway, will prevent anyone from doing you harm from entering. Caroline, while being chased, starts drawing lines directly in front of her which stops her assailants dead in their tracks. It reminded me a bit of Foghorn Leghorn drawing a line in the sand at the end of the dog's leash.

I don't like to give out spoilers in my reviews, and further revelations of the plot would spoil and surprises for anyone who ignores my low rating and goes to see this movie.

The movie follows an all too familiar formula and fails to produce legitimate scares. The creepy mood of the movie is spoiled by the borderline outrageous silliness of the jar of brickdust which acted like the Fish's and the Loaves and never seemed to run out. Also familiar is the landscape. The driveway to the house looks all too much like the "RUN FORREST RUN!" scene from Forrest Gump, and the house itself might actually be the same house from "Fletch Lives"

About 2/3rds though the movie I began to feel like I had been a victim of a "hoo-doo" curse. It was, however just the hot acidic taste of bile at the top on my throat when the brickdust came into play.