Wolfman
(1979)
review by Catwalk

Opening with a dark and stormy night, Wolfman’s credits are drawn in dripping red lettering, the first in a long line of clichés from this film. To set the evil mood, the opening scene is a human sacrifice, followed by the introduction of the protagonist. Colin Glasgow (Owensby) returns home in time to hear of his father’s demise (see aforementioned sacrifice) and to sort out the will. The problem is, the family has a curse put on them that makes them werewolves. Obviously, if they were vampires, the title would be particularly misleading.

Shot in a continuously dark manner, with dialogue along the same pace as “Quest for Fire”, set off a few alarms at this point. One was the glaring 102 minute running time staring up from the DVD box. The other was the equally glaring absence of alcohol in the reviewer’s glass. Rectifying the second made the first a little less painful.

One of the cross-culture events that adds flavor to the movie is that the satanic priest with long beard and dark eyes looks a lot like Radio Hall of Fame DJ Wolfman Jack. Coincidence? Hmmm…. Oh, spoiler alert, there’s a satanic priest. Ah, hell, that’s not spoiler, it happens ten minutes into the film. He calls forth a curse, complete with organ music, shots of stuffed animals, rolling thunder and self-opening doors.

Owensby’s performance is supposed to reveal that he grew up in the U.S. while his family stayed in England (until the obligatory redneck hunting party). This is revealed through early dialogue, and by the fact that Owensby’s every mannerism reveals two things; he got into acting because he watched a lot of John Wayne, and he knew Elvis Presley. Apparently, they went to acting school together, because Owensby is a half-step away from breaking into “Blue Hawaii” at any moment. Best known as a producer, Owensby clearly does his best work behind the camera.

As the plot twists with an array of strange characters, including the crazy grandmother, the Jewish doctor, the town drunk and the love interest, the film stretches a thin plot even thinner. Several dream sequences reveal more organ music, fuzzy camera lenses and the fact that Owensby was cast in the role because without his shirt on, he’s likely mistaken for a werewolf at least four times a day.

About the werewolves…during the day, the statement is that you can tell a person is a werewolf because they have long index fingers. In that case, stay away from Arsenio Hall during a full moon.

The transformation and first attack scenes are unimpressive, which is to say on par with the rest of the movie. Despite the time of its release, the film’s effects are closer to the Lon Cheney, Jr. era than the American Werewolf in London. Even the creature himself is lost in the dark shots. As for music, the composer apparently studied in porn, because the majority of the soundtrack is about eight bars of a repeating loop.

As for the finale’, it comes too late, and could be saved sooner if the priest was stabbing the hero with the blade of the knife instead of hitting him with the hilt. That should say it all.

Extras include a movie trivia game, DVD dictionary, scene selection and a short film called “Spooky Hooky” featuring the Little Rascals. Originally released in 1936, the gang, led by Spanky McFarlane and Alfalfa Switzer, skip out of school and are subject to storms and scares. With his signature blend of physical comedy, Buckwheat of course steals the show. The DVD is also playable via computer for access to these same features.