FOLLOW/LIKE US!
User login

Supergirl XXX

Review by: 
Sinferno
Release Date: 
2011
Studio: 
Extreme Comixx
Genre: 
Adult/Parody
Format: 
DVD
Region: 
1 NTSC
Aspect Ratio: 
1.85:1
Directed by: 
Robert Black
Cast: 
Alanah Rae
Sunny Lane
Andy San Dimas
Movie: 
2
Extras: 
4
Bottom Line: 
2

While the New Superman film comes out today I am only here to steal some of the search engine buzz for my usual filthy purpose. Once again Extreme Comixx has taken a comic hero from our youth and turned it into an unrepentant porno.  Todays’ offering is “SUPER GIRL XXX” a curious choice for a comic tie-in as there hasn’t been a live action “Super Girl” Movie since 1984 when Helen Slater first put some new curves in the stale old “S” suit which as of 2013 has been an American icon for seventy five years now. Moreover, before today there has been a recent attempt to make a decent version of Superman since the death of Christopher Reeves in Superman Returns (2006) and suffice to say it was bigger a commercial failure and more offensive to both casual film goers actual comic book nuts than any recent attempt to render a comic character in real time/live action except for maybe those last two God-awful Incredible Hulk movies. The reason I am bringing this up is as of now is the fact that for the past six Extreme Comixx films I reviewed were all tightly based on an actual film, video game or television show franchise that everyone was somewhat familiar with. In the case of Super Girl, not too many people are aware of her character whatsoever which makes it difficult to parody, even in a trite hyper sexualized fashion with scenes featuring full penetration. With no further ado let us take a few careful, critical shots at SuperGirl XXX and see what bounces off…

In an opening scene that was stolen From Superman and Superman 2, a young woman is sent by her parents to Earth moments before their home world Krypton is destroyed. She is instructed to find her cousin Jor-el (Superman) who came to earth some time before her. So after some crude animations that depict (suggest actually) planets exploding and escape pods landing on earth, Super Girl eventually shows up at the door of Superman who makes time for her (after banging Lois Lane of course). From there it is decided that since young Supergirl/ Linda Lee knows nothing of our world and earthly culture that the only thing that makes sense is to enroll her in a college level State University where she can learn our ways. (Cripes, talk about an accelerated academic program).

Once there she makes the acquaintance of Barbara Gordon (Bat Girl) and they attend the Sorority of Pi, Pi, Pi in the hope of being a full-fledged member. But not so fast, it seems the Sorority is none other than the front designed to conceal the criminal enterprise of none other than the daughter of Lex Luthor himself, Natasha Luthor.  Ably played by a particularly mean and demented Andy San Dimas, Natasha fills her days plotting world conquest through mind control via a new Facebook type of social media and orchestrating orgies with all the new would be female pledges where five women are expected to declare their devotion to the House of PI by all having sex with each other and two guys which she generously provides for just such a purpose. Sadly Linda Lee (now posing as a mind mannered college student) finds herself among these new pledges and not wanting to blow her cover she expertly blows a couple of other things by the end of the scene…

Of course this quick thinking on the part of Miss Lee only buys her a precious few moments, because while she is becoming acquainted with all manner of Earth Culture and “native tongues” Natasha Luther has already begun to pillage Super Girl’s dorm room in her relentless desire to prove that her suspicions that young Miss Lee is somehow more than just another American college girl who can be peer pressured into bizarre situations of drunken waywardness and group sex in the hope of “fitting in”. So relentless is her ransacking that she barely takes time to have sex with Bruno Mannheim (Metropolises most feared human gangster) who has shown up to search exact same room looking for information on Bat Girl (Barbara Gordon) “Super Girl’s” roommate.

From there things get purely non-objective/porno for a bit as there is a scene where Barbara and Sunny lay in bed together and discuss the social media subplot before Barbara breaks away to take a shower where she seems to vigorously, passionately scrub some small parts of herself to the exclusion of all others.  Little does she know that Super Girl is secretly watching her through the wall through the magic of X ray sight, “Supervising” her bathing routine in literal ways never before attributed to that word. It’s kind of an endearing scene, not because of its fetishistic leer into latent lesbian lusts which many of you will accuse me of having a weakness for, but because it is the only actual use of superpowers exhibited by any character whatsoever in the film a hundred minutes into this thing that actually serves to somehow benefit them if not foreshadow a future plot event…

In time Super Girl gets a letter in the mail saying that she has been accepted into Pi,Pi,Pi and as instructed  she attends a secret meeting where she is immediately tricked (of course) into pulling a lever on a giant machine which hits her with a blast of Krypton radiation which immediately renders her weak enough to be captured along with Barbara. A struggle ensues as Natasha dispatches an old boyfriend in the only way two dimensional comic villains get rid of an underling but not before he destroys the machine keeping Super Girl paralyzed, just for spite.

Natasha beats a sudden retreat taking Barbara Gordon with her as a prisoner and Super Girl soon arrives and rescues Batgirl.  The two women immediately join forces and kill Natasha. Moments later, they commemorate this heroic act by joining bodies and killing all chances at an unrated ending.  Girl Power!

Look this one was kind of sloppy and it had actually nothing to do with the admittedly undeveloped “Super Girl” franchise and in fact was written around the last Superman movies; from the “sound alike” title theme from the eighties originals to the recent 2006 version which featured a scene where our caped crusader shrugs off a bullet to the eye like so much dust.  Also for the first time in an Extreme Comixx title we meet a character “Natasha Luther” that simply never existed in any form in the original comic series whatsoever. This is pure gleaming porno shot on digital, so it isn’t unwatchable by any means but all previous Extreme Comixx have all been of such a meticulous quality that it makes it all but impossible to notice this volumes shortcoming, even on the things series usually does really well. For example, even though all the incredible costume design was apparent in this film as all previous Extreme Comixx, “Super Girl” spends most of the film in a crummy brunette wig and the drab, conservative Earth clothing of a female Clark Kent. This “Super Girl” was more of an average, at best.

Extras include that second disk full of behind the scenes “Making of Super Girl” bonus material including those final moments of “Man Soup” being made onscreen at the conclusion of every scene.

As a final note it should be said that Sunny Lane (The Porn Star who plays Barbara Gordon) looks strikingly like Morgan Smith Goodwin, better known as the Wendy’s Girl, that hot little redhead who is the company’s spokesman on the latest series of television advertisements (that always end with a maddening sexual innuendo).  Because my brain has been exposed to perhaps way too many naughty pictures, there was a strange moment recently after having just seen SUPERGIRL XXX when I saw this exact commercial where she was eagerly extolling the joys of “Going face first into a Baconator”

supergirlxxx.jpg

When I heard this I HONESTLY thought she said “going face first into a baby maker” and I actually spit up my drink. I can’t begin to tell you how happy I was when I discovered it was a simple phonetic mistake and I hadn’t snapped yet.  

 

 

0
Your rating: None